Best seen with Notes about this site More Irish Jokes When Clinton visited the Pope, he noticed a red phone on a small table in the corner of the office. After several minutes of conversation, Clinton asked the Pope what the red phone was. The Holy Father told him that it was a very special phone with a direct line to God. However, the Pope told Clinton he rarely used it because it cost $20,000 a minute from the Vatican. Clinton accepted this explanation without another thought. Later, when Clinton visited Ireland, he saw another red phone in the Archbishop’s office. Being curious, Clinton asked the Archbishop what it was used for. The Archbishop told Clinton it was a direct line to God, and he used it whenever he had a puzzling question or concern. Clinton asked if the calls were quite expensive since the Pope had to pay $20,000 a minute when he used his red phone in the Vatican. "Oh no," replied the Archbishop, "In Ireland it’s a local call." A farmer named McBride lived alone in the Irish countryside with a pet dog he doted on. The dog finally died and McBride went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, the dog is dead. Could you be saying a mass for the creature?" Father Michael replied, "No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church, but there's a new denomination down the road. No telling what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the animal." McBride said "I'll go right now. Do you think $50,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Michael asked, "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic?" An Irishman's been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So he stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stands up and falls flat on his face. So he crawls home and at the door stands up and again falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door and up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he tries one more time to stand up. This time he falls right into bed and falls sound asleep. He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!" "How did you know?" he asks. "The pub called, you left your wheelchair there, again." Paddy was tooling along the road one fine day when the local policeman, a friend of his, pulled him over. "What's wrong, Seamus?" Paddy asked. "Well didn't ya know, Paddy, that your wife fell out of the car about five miles back?" said Seamus. "Ah, praise the Almighty!" Paddy replied with relief. "I thought I'd gone deaf!" As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and made her way to New York where before long, she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always attended as a child. In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips. Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!" Saint Patrick Soldier's Song Irish Blessings Irish Jokes Danny Boy Irish Lullaby Galway Bay Galway Bay - Parody You Know You Are Irish Clancy Lowered the Boom Rose of Tralee H-A-R-R-I-G-A-N Little Bit of Heaven Wearing of the Green Kerry Dancer Come Back Paddy Reilly More Irish Jokes Coming Soon When Irish Eyes are Smiling I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen Coming Soon
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When Clinton visited the Pope, he noticed a red phone on a small table in the corner of the office. After several minutes of conversation, Clinton asked the Pope what the red phone was. The Holy Father told him that it was a very special phone with a direct line to God. However, the Pope told Clinton he rarely used it because it cost $20,000 a minute from the Vatican. Clinton accepted this explanation without another thought. Later, when Clinton visited Ireland, he saw another red phone in the Archbishop’s office. Being curious, Clinton asked the Archbishop what it was used for. The Archbishop told Clinton it was a direct line to God, and he used it whenever he had a puzzling question or concern. Clinton asked if the calls were quite expensive since the Pope had to pay $20,000 a minute when he used his red phone in the Vatican. "Oh no," replied the Archbishop, "In Ireland it’s a local call." A farmer named McBride lived alone in the Irish countryside with a pet dog he doted on. The dog finally died and McBride went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, the dog is dead. Could you be saying a mass for the creature?" Father Michael replied, "No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church, but there's a new denomination down the road. No telling what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the animal." McBride said "I'll go right now. Do you think $50,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Michael asked, "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic?" An Irishman's been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So he stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stands up and falls flat on his face. So he crawls home and at the door stands up and again falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door and up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he tries one more time to stand up. This time he falls right into bed and falls sound asleep. He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!" "How did you know?" he asks. "The pub called, you left your wheelchair there, again." Paddy was tooling along the road one fine day when the local policeman, a friend of his, pulled him over. "What's wrong, Seamus?" Paddy asked. "Well didn't ya know, Paddy, that your wife fell out of the car about five miles back?" said Seamus. "Ah, praise the Almighty!" Paddy replied with relief. "I thought I'd gone deaf!" As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and made her way to New York where before long, she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always attended as a child. In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips. Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!" Saint Patrick Soldier's Song Irish Blessings Irish Jokes Danny Boy Irish Lullaby Galway Bay Galway Bay - Parody You Know You Are Irish Clancy Lowered the Boom Rose of Tralee H-A-R-R-I-G-A-N Little Bit of Heaven Wearing of the Green Kerry Dancer Come Back Paddy Reilly More Irish Jokes Coming Soon When Irish Eyes are Smiling I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen Coming Soon
A farmer named McBride lived alone in the Irish countryside with a pet dog he doted on. The dog finally died and McBride went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, the dog is dead. Could you be saying a mass for the creature?" Father Michael replied, "No, we cannot have service for an animal in the church, but there's a new denomination down the road. No telling what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the animal." McBride said "I'll go right now. Do you think $50,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Michael asked, "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic?" An Irishman's been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So he stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stands up and falls flat on his face. So he crawls home and at the door stands up and again falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door and up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he tries one more time to stand up. This time he falls right into bed and falls sound asleep. He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!" "How did you know?" he asks. "The pub called, you left your wheelchair there, again." Paddy was tooling along the road one fine day when the local policeman, a friend of his, pulled him over. "What's wrong, Seamus?" Paddy asked. "Well didn't ya know, Paddy, that your wife fell out of the car about five miles back?" said Seamus. "Ah, praise the Almighty!" Paddy replied with relief. "I thought I'd gone deaf!" As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and made her way to New York where before long, she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always attended as a child. In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips. Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!" Saint Patrick Soldier's Song Irish Blessings Irish Jokes Danny Boy Irish Lullaby Galway Bay Galway Bay - Parody You Know You Are Irish Clancy Lowered the Boom Rose of Tralee H-A-R-R-I-G-A-N Little Bit of Heaven Wearing of the Green Kerry Dancer Come Back Paddy Reilly More Irish Jokes Coming Soon When Irish Eyes are Smiling I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen Coming Soon
An Irishman's been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So he stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stands up and falls flat on his face. So he crawls home and at the door stands up and again falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door and up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he tries one more time to stand up. This time he falls right into bed and falls sound asleep. He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!" "How did you know?" he asks. "The pub called, you left your wheelchair there, again." Paddy was tooling along the road one fine day when the local policeman, a friend of his, pulled him over. "What's wrong, Seamus?" Paddy asked. "Well didn't ya know, Paddy, that your wife fell out of the car about five miles back?" said Seamus. "Ah, praise the Almighty!" Paddy replied with relief. "I thought I'd gone deaf!" As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and made her way to New York where before long, she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always attended as a child. In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips. Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!" Saint Patrick Soldier's Song Irish Blessings Irish Jokes Danny Boy Irish Lullaby Galway Bay Galway Bay - Parody You Know You Are Irish Clancy Lowered the Boom Rose of Tralee H-A-R-R-I-G-A-N Little Bit of Heaven Wearing of the Green Kerry Dancer Come Back Paddy Reilly More Irish Jokes Coming Soon When Irish Eyes are Smiling I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen Coming Soon
Paddy was tooling along the road one fine day when the local policeman, a friend of his, pulled him over. "What's wrong, Seamus?" Paddy asked. "Well didn't ya know, Paddy, that your wife fell out of the car about five miles back?" said Seamus. "Ah, praise the Almighty!" Paddy replied with relief. "I thought I'd gone deaf!" As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and made her way to New York where before long, she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always attended as a child. In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips. Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!" Saint Patrick Soldier's Song Irish Blessings Irish Jokes Danny Boy Irish Lullaby Galway Bay Galway Bay - Parody You Know You Are Irish Clancy Lowered the Boom Rose of Tralee H-A-R-R-I-G-A-N Little Bit of Heaven Wearing of the Green Kerry Dancer Come Back Paddy Reilly More Irish Jokes Coming Soon When Irish Eyes are Smiling I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen Coming Soon
As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and made her way to New York where before long, she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always attended as a child. In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips. Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!" Saint Patrick Soldier's Song Irish Blessings Irish Jokes Danny Boy Irish Lullaby Galway Bay Galway Bay - Parody You Know You Are Irish Clancy Lowered the Boom Rose of Tralee H-A-R-R-I-G-A-N Little Bit of Heaven Wearing of the Green Kerry Dancer Come Back Paddy Reilly More Irish Jokes Coming Soon When Irish Eyes are Smiling I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen Coming Soon
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